Safety Protocols for Human Holidays by Angel Martinez

A big welcome today to Angel Martinez as part of her blog tour with Other Worlds Ink. Safety Protocols for Human Holiday is part of A Holiday to Remember – a collection of holiday themed novellas from Mischief Corner Books.

An Homage to Human Steve
Angel Martinez

It all starts with Human Steve. If you’re not familiar, Human Steve is a fun trope on Tumblr in which people imagine how cooperative (and sometimes antagonistic) relations between humans and aliens would work. Google “Human Steve on Tumblr.” Many of the posts start out with the alien, excited about a discovery in regard to human culture, yelling “Human Steve! Human Steve!” You’ll get the idea rather quickly.

Safety Protocols For Human Holidays is my homage to Human Steve, who navigates cultural weirdness such as explaining birthdays and bedtime stories to alien allies. Because, let’s face it, human cultures are bizarre if you try to explain them to someone who has no context.

I found the premise of a ship full of a variety of aliens trying to navigate our winter holiday celebrations absolutely irresistible. Think about explaining the tree lighting ceremonies many of us have in our cities to your alien friend, who then runs to a same-species friend and tries, in wide-eyed horror, what you’ve told them.

No, listen. They slice a huge chlorophyll-utilizing being, sometimes a century old, from its base and drag the dying being through the streets to the central community hub. Then they prop the sacrifice up and hang lights and shining objects from its limbs.


Some offering to fearsome war gods? I was afraid to ask. They even have ritual songs to sing to the slowly dying being and they bring their young to view it.

That’s—that’s horrifying, Glurb! And Human Steve seemed pleased describing this ritual?

Gleefully nostalgic, would be my guess.

The above conversation doesn’t happen in this story, but it’s easy to see how we could have these misunderstandings and misinterpretations with someone Not From Around Here. Human Jen has the advantage of working on an inter-species ship, so cultural pitfall awareness is standard crew training. Still, humans are strange enough that they still give their crewmates periodic fits, even more so when the human in question isn’t forthcoming with direct answers herself.

Thanks, Human Steve. 😀

A Holiday to Remember banner

For the first time, Mischief Corner Books is releasing a month-long collection of holiday-themed tales:

Traditional Winter Holidays can be tough for a variety of reasons—family pressures, finding the right gift, homesick longing, and haunting memories to name a few. This collection showcases eleven queer short stories, from tender contemporaries to sweet paranormal to far-flung space tales, all designed to make you want to reach for your hot cocoa and your favorite snuggly spot. Come join us for A Holiday To Remember.

A Holiday to Remember - All Covers


Rainbow Beanie - AHTR Prize

For this tour, Mischief Corner Books is giving away two $25 gift certificates to their eBook store, and two rainbow beanies. To enter, just use the rafflecopter here, or below:

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Safety Protocols For Human Holidays
Angel Martinez

As a security officer on an interspecies ship, Growlan Raskli’s experienced in heading off species-specific aberrant behaviors in order to keep the peace. But when her captain asks her to find out what’s bothering their sole human crew member, Raskli’s out of her depths. She hardly knows anything about humans and she’s not a psych doctor.

Something’s definitely upset Human Jen, something to do with human holidays. The more time Raskli spends studying humans and interacting with the intriguing Human Jen, the more personal the assignment becomes. Determined to lift the dark cloud from Human Jen, Raskli will do whatever it takes—within safe parameters, of course.

While Angel Martinez is the erotic fiction pen name of a writer of several genres, she writes both kinds of queer fiction – Science Fiction and Fantasy. Currently living part time in the hectic sprawl of northern Delaware, (and full time inside the author’s head) Angel has one husband, one son, two cats, a changing variety of other furred and scaled companions, a love of all things beautiful and a terrible addiction to the consumption of both knowledge and chocolate. For more information on Angel’s work, please visit:

Website: Erotic Fiction for the Hungry Mind

About Anne Barwell

Anne Barwell lives in Wellington, New Zealand. She shares her home with a cat with “tortitude” who is convinced that the house is run to suit her; this is an ongoing “discussion,” and to date, it appears as though Kaylee may be winning. In 2008, Anne completed her conjoint BA in English Literature and Music/Bachelor of Teaching. She has worked as a music teacher, a primary school teacher, and now works in a library. She is a member of the Upper Hutt Science Fiction Club and plays violin for Hutt Valley Orchestra. She is an avid reader across a wide range of genres and a watcher of far too many TV series and movies, although it can be argued that there is no such thing as “too many.” These, of course, are best enjoyed with a decent cup of tea and further the continuing argument that the concept of “spare time” is really just a myth. She also hosts and reviews for other authors, and writes monthly blog posts for Love Bytes. She is the co-founder of the New Zealand Rainbow Romance writers, and a member of RWNZ. Anne’s books have received honorable mentions five times, reached the finals four times—one of which was for best gay book—and been a runner up in the Rainbow Awards. She has also been nominated twice in the Goodreads M/M Romance Reader’s Choice Awards—once for Best Fantasy and once for Best Historical. Anne can be found at
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